So I went and watch “He’s Just Not That Into You” tonight with a couple of friends and then we went to dinner. And the whole time we were eating all I could think of was no no no NO NO NO, that movie was not right. This is not right or good.
We live in a media saturated world…I mean honestly you’re reading a blog right now which is considered social media, but media none the less. And in this saturated world, idols are born. Idols like STUPID (yes I yelled it) Edward Cullin, who is not even a human yet girls, teenagers, and grown women have fallen for him, idolizing the man he portrays that they will never find. Why? Well, for starters he is a vampire. Second, it’s a fictional idolization of what men are. Women would be pissed if men actually expected them to be like Barbie, whining about how 1.) it’s anatomically impossible and 2.) so mean and _____ (whatever men bashing term they choose) Yet women are expecting men to be a vampire that will dash around in the night saving them. And it’s real. People really feel that way sadly…..
And there this is this movie. A movie based on a book which countless people have read. Which, honestly holds some truth and merit. If it’s been a week and he has not called, he’s probably not gonna call. If you call me and I don’t call you back in a week, I’m probably not calling. That’s a pretty accurate statement. Also an accurate statement “myspace is the new booty call” However, we wonder why our society has a 50% divorce rate….because the media projects it as normal and easy. The media is not fully responsible for this, that’s not what I’m saying at all. But seriously I’m just so sad at the fallacies portrayed here. Every marriage struggles and has battles but they don’t all have to suck like the one in the movie. They made marriage look sloppy, miserable, and incomplete. The men looked like total donkeys while they cheated, drank beer, ignored family issues, and played video games. (and maybe thats what you think of when you think of men but i refuse to believe that is what we strive for and get when we get married) And then the one guy who showed a sensitive side, who was emotionally in tune to his woman and a protector to her feelings didn’t believe in marriage. So we made it ok that they lived together for 7 years and his committment was that he was still there.
I just don’t get it honestly. Because now women will overanalyze encounters with men. And most women I know already overanalyze these encounters. And I’m scared that now women will never trust men because they all either treat you like crap, forget about you, cheat on you, or won’t marry you according to this movie. Ya ya ya it all turned out ok. But I’m not ok with how it got there. I’m really not.
I think there were lots of awesome lines. I think there was some wisdom in it. I also think there was some danger.
Because the truth is that
“I am my beloved’s and His desire is for me” SOS 7:10
Your man/husband may be tempted by his flesh and the red lipstick of another women, but a man of God will seek to love you through Christ’s love, to mirror his love for you after Christ’s love for His bride. Which is a love of desire. And you will fulfill that desire for him. (and if you ever go to fulfill that in his office, don’t wear a pencil skirt for crying out loud!)
Bah, this is a ranting post. This post should probably just be deleted. But I’m tired of girls thinking that the future of men is a cheating husband, or non-committment, or one that you can keep around but don’t care about. I know that I have a slighted view on this stuff and that’s why we don’t discuss this kind of thing here. But I just think it’s sad that we accept this as ok and right because it’s what the media portrays as an accurate picture of relationships, love, and marriage. I still believe it is more than that, and I don’t even want to get married.
For more on this topic please visit my friend Brandi. She is more eloquent than I.