“Oh, poor thing you must be miserable”
“Oh just wait hunny in God’s timing it will all work out”
“Well if you would just stop looking it will come”
“Just be patient and it will be better than you ever imagined”
“You just need to spend more time with Jesus and He will complete you”
“Get over it”
“You should meet my cousin/uncle’s brother’s nephew/pool boy/manny”
All of these are responses that my friends and I have heard lately concerning our singleness. Now let me start off by letting you know that the 4 friends that I have talked with lately about being single are not desperate, depressed or disgusting.
In fact, my single friends are quite the catch and someday they and their mates will be happily singing “Let’s talk about sex baby, let’s talk about you and me” by Salt ‘N’ Pepa and making me some babies to hold. However, until then they are happy to be rocking out some great time with Jesus and being content. This does not mean there is no struggle in being single. It does not mean that sometimes there is sadness or days that are harder than others. It just means there is not a desperation about being single or a sadness about not having a ring on the finger.
It’s crazy to me though that the above statements are true statements that come out of people’s mouth. O glory. Thank you for the words of encouragement. And I know that many of these statements came from people who genuinely cared and wanted to help. But maybe that’s the problem.
Maybe we don’t need to “fix” the single people. Maybe it’s ok and healthy and beneficial for them to be single. But when we make comments about not being patient enough or in tune with Jesus’ plan enough we assume they are not getting it, that they are missing something. All of the above statements have grains of truth in them and to some people really need to be said and would hold weight. But not all statements for single people are applicable to single people.
There are true benefits to being single and sometimes everyone else gets so busy telling people to “fix” their singleness that everyone misses the lessons and advantages of being single.
So, if you are single, rejoice in it! Get excited about why you are single and what you can make of it. If you’re married, relish it. Enjoy it! Love it! Work on it daily. Don’t worry about your single friends…most of them will turn out just fine.
And as an added bonus. Something all the singles and I have laughed about lately…
is the response you get if you say you are not sure you want to get married….
“But you have such great hair/eyes”
being hot is not a good reason to get married.
I’m just saying.