Last night was rough – some groups just are. Some services feel like utter chaos – no matter how “prepared” we are. It doesn’t matter that it’s the same information, leaders are communicated with and the room is the same. Each service has its own personality – and last night’s felt like that awkward kid at the lunch table who you try to talk to but you can tell they really don’t want you there.
It was awkward lunch kid service.
And it was humbling. And painful.
So this morning Jesus and I were wrestling on the way to work – “Seriously God I can’t do 2 of those in a row. This has to be better. They deserve better. Connect with them. Get me out of the way.” *****Silence***** “No really God that hurt last night.” *******Silence******* “Uh….so today is all you – I want you to run with it, be loud to them and make me quiet” ******Silence****** “So that line didn’t impress you….crap. Well, I’m gonna trust you anyway”
Then I walk inside to our room and 2 of our amazing MS girls had cleaned the room up and set up our cafe. It was HUGE f0r me in that moment.
I learn from them. They teach me. All I have to do is shut up and listen to the things God is trying to teach me through their actions, their questions, their fears, their growth. Behind it all He is trying to move me. He is trying to encourage and challenge me in the next steps. He is not ****silent**** He just sounds more like a 13 girl than the booming loud voice I would like sometimes.